


These war and games

by Bebec



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Action & Romance, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angel Wings, Angst, Apocalypse, Developing Relationship, Drama & Romance, F/M, Flashbacks, Memory Loss, Post Episode s02e18, Revelations, Season/Series 02, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-02-07 23:57:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12852288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bebec/pseuds/Bebec
Summary: POST S02E18Something is coming. Something terrible...For him, for her and the rest of Humanity. Chloe's life only depends on him.He can save her. He can save them all.All he had to do is... remember.





	1. No more going backwards

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everybody ! 
> 
> This story is in my mind since the end of the season two. I needed to write something else than my usual stories and to finally write this vague idea running in my mind for months, now. 
> 
> My beta challenged me to write only about Lucifer's POV. And that's what I'll try to do. Sorry for the ones who love Chloe's POV or any other POV. 
> 
> Musique advice : 
> 
> 1) " The World is unraveling " - Milck (soundtrack from the last episode).  
> 2) " Dear God " - Lawless feat. Sydney Wayser. 
> 
> DISCLAIMER : the characters didn't belong to me. They belong to FOX. 
> 
> Happy reading !

**_" No more going backwards. "_ **

Warm. 

Searing, even. 

Why  _searing_? 

He had no idea. He didn't really want to know why, actually. 

He just wanted it to stop, that this unbearable heat stops lapping at his body and mind. He just wanted to stop feeling this furnace. This stinging pain in his skull intensified by this steady burning in the air. 

Where the hell was he? 

Why couldn't he open his eyes or simply move the rest of his body? 

The possibility to be back in Hell quickly crossed his mind, but faded as quickly. That wasn't possible. He couldn't be in Hell. How could he have been back there, except by his own physical death? 

Was that it? Was he dead? 

No. 

He could now feel the caress of his laborious breath against his hand, the steady lifting of his chest with each new inhalation along with another sensation each time more painful than the previous one. More conscious than the last few seconds, or maybe longer than that, he managed to name this rough  _thing_ that was itching his skin and frequently lashing his face. 

Sand. 

No return to Hell, then. 

Hell was surely a quite  _warm_  place, but it hadn't arid area of this kind. Not as far as he knew, at least. And he knew enough about this place to be pretty sure of himself. Still, he couldn't be so affirmative about his current situation. Not until he'd finally decide to regain control of his body and mind. 

And with all the strength he could still have inside him, Lucifer slowly opened his eyes. 

An unbearable lightness assaulted his retinas, forcing him to briefly close his eyes again to avoid to become blind for the rest of his existence. If the devil could be exposed to this king of risk, of course. He made another try, moistening his lips with his tongue. These seemed want to rival with the aridity nearby. His throat was as searing as the air he was breathing, which didn't reduce Lucifer's discomfort. Once accustomed to the lightness around him, he saw the vague edges of his right arm supporting his head as heavy as lead that he tried to lift from a few inches. 

One move after another. 

He could do this. 

He felt suddenly nauseous as he began to lean on his forearm to get back on his feet, Lucifer clutching his hand in the burning sand. His heart was beating fiercely inside his chest, as if he had been doing intense physical training or something. 

All this didn't make any sense. 

Lucifer closed his eyes, inhaling deeply the stifling air filled with sand before leaning more on his numbed forearms. The world strongly reeled all around him, making briefly eclipsing the strong brightness of this arid area, but Lucifer stubbornly kept sustaining his momentum. He staggered once standing on his legs, almost collapsing again on the ground. 

_" Come on, Luci... You can do this! "_

He swallowed, the inside of his mouth remaining stubbornly indifferent to this attempt of dampening. The burning sensation didn't lower either once he managed to stay more or less steady on his both legs. 

Everything was burning around him. 

The sand was burning his bare, skinned feet. The wind was burning the damaged skin of his bare chest. Just as the blazing star, that he had once created with his  **F** ather, was tirelessly tormenting his eyes, swallowing the smallest part of water that could possibly have remained inside his aching body. Breathless, Lucifer mechanically placed his hand before his eyes, hoping – quite stupidly – to stop the inevitable sunlight. The desert was still really fuzzy in front of him, with vague figures suggesting a few dense bushes or distant mountains. 

Everything was blurring. The landscape, his thoughts... 

How did he get here? 

Lucifer quickly lowered his arm, tired of trying in vain to soften his pain. The sun wouldn't suddenly stop shining in the sky just because he'd decide that way... Not anymore, anyway. It was more important to him to find out what had brought him to this desert, far from any honorable human civilization. And far from the rest of his clothes, it seemed. 

He tried to remember the latest events, his thoughts clashing inside his skull before gathering in a more or less coherent thread. He remembered visiting Linda. He remembered calling the detective without having her on the line, leaving a message before hanging up. 

And then... 

A flash of pain split his skull, Lucifer taking his head in his hands as he let out a hoarse cry.

**_"_ ** **_You d_ ** **_.-… not have a_ ** **_choice_ ** **_!_ ** **_"_ **

**_" Sam-…! You can no_ ** **_longer_ ** **** **_esc-… -_ ** **_ine_ ** **** **_justice_ ** **_!_ ** **_"_ **

The strong pain faded quickly, leaving behind only a shooting pain inside his skull. Lucifer took a noisy, hoarse breath, blinking several times with his hands still against his temples. 

What the hell was that? 

He felt something wet running along his stiff neck. He moved his hand to this spot, then looking with growing confusion a crimson hue covering his fingers. 

Blood. 

His own blood. 

Lucifer stroked his fingers covered in blood, frowning. How could it be his own blood? He was invulnerable. At least, he was when Chloe wasn't around. And she wasn't there, in this desert. It was obvious. He moved his hand covered in blood to his head again, feeling carefully every accessible inch of his achy skull. He stopped this  _auscultation_ a few moments later, another stabbing pain answering instinctively to his clumsy touch as his fingers brushed the back of his head. His hear wasn't covered with tough sand, but with dried blood. Lucifer held back a plaintive whistling and flinched with the new rush of pain. An odd sensation appeared between his shoulder blades, like an instinctive reaction of his body to the cost of his mind. 

A forgotten sensation. 

First, he thought to have imagined that soft touch, that heavy weight on his back he hadn't felt since a few years. Since he'd left Hell behind. 

_" No. "_

Slowly, Lucifer lowered his hand down his side, hardly swallowing, as much by the constant aridity inside his throat as by the strong apprehension he was feeling right now. He turned his head slowly to his left. Then to his right. 

_" No...  No. "_

His breathing became sporadic, responding to the rage and misunderstanding that stifled his entire body, his entire thoughts. He looked up, staring wide-eyed at the blue sky above him, a silent question on his crazed lips and in this horrified expression. 

_" Why? "_

Why? He never asked **H** im this! Never! 

His huge white wings took their full expansion along his sides, further imposing their return in his life. Whatever his desires, they were back to be at one with him. Lucifer clenched his fists, glaring at the indifferent sky. 

" I never asked  **Y** ou this! ", he muttered. 

What had  **H** e imagined, this time, huh? 

That Lucifer would welcome this umpteenth manipulation of his own free will because... because  _what_?! Because he'd have suddenly changed his mind, this change manifesting as do not take celestial revenge with the Flaming Sword?! Because he'd preferred to send his mother anywhere else instead of risking other lives with this stupid quarrel?! 

Because  _what_  ?!

He hadn't asked anything in return. Nothing. 

He stubbornly stared at the sky with all the hatred he had in him, hoping for a reaction, something that would explain this absurdity a little bit. 

Nothing came, except the pestering wing along his wings. 

Of course. 

Lucifer let out a bitter exclamation and finally lowered his gaze. Of course, he wouldn't get an answer. Why would he get one now, after so many millennia retreated into silence? He looked around him again, losing interest in the untimely return of these appendages in his back to focus on something completely different. He had to find out what had happened to him. And make a quick gateway from this unknown dry place. 

Where did he end up? Had he come so far of his own free will or-…? No, probably not. Who had taken him here? Why? How? 

Why did everything get mixed up in his head? 

Lucifer couldn't remember anything after hanging up. He looked again at the bright sun that didn't seem to want to stop its unchanging lightness burning his skin. How long had he been in this desert? He searched the inside of his pockets without finding anything useful. Not a trace to his phone or his car keys. Although neither of these things would have been a great help to him right now. He doubted he could find any network here to call Mazikeen or even the detective t-…

Chloe. 

His call. 

" Bloody Hell... ", he swore, worried. 

He'd promised her. 

No more going backwards. 

What would she think of him by not seeing him coming to her home? Definitely the worst. How could he blame her for that? Lucifer was the only one to blame here. He had so often disappointed and hurt her that his disappearance would inevitably appear as another evasion in the eyes of the young woman. 

He had to join her. Clear up this misunderstanding. 

But  _how_  ? 

He still didn't where he was and where to go. Walking in this desert, without any guide, it was... he wasn't even sure to be able to walk such a distance. Whatever was the distance to walk to join the civilization. To join  _her._  

Hesitant, Lucifer looked over his shoulder his big feathery appendages grazing his burned sides with each of his gesture. He didn't have to  _walk_ , strictly speaking. The fly path could replace the sandy path. A possibility quite conceivable if it would be another celestial being than Lucifer. 

Impossible, then. 

He didn't want their return. And he didn't want to use them in any ways. It was out of the question to give his  **F** ather this satisfaction. 

That was absolutely out of the question. 

Lucifer put his hand covered with sand over his dazzled eyes, scanning one last time the arid area before taking a decision. He took a deep breath, his wings vanishing into the relentless sunray's. He lowered his hand and started to walk straight ahead. 

The so-called  _Christ_ had walked the desert for forty days and forty nights, a mere philosophical mortal crazy enough to interest the devil himself with this crazy journey. If an insane human could have survived so long in such a place without drinking or even eating...

Lucifer Morningstar could do it as well.  

 

** ***** **

 

How long was he walking? 

A minute? 

An hour? A whole day? 

The sun hadn't move an inch, burning Lucifer's bare, skinned back without interruption. Following each step, each wavering step on the arid and stony ground still stretching before him as far as the eye can see. 

The wind, lashing sand and chafing his eyes reddened with exhaustion and heat, ruffled his ears from time to time, the noisy blast of air turning into odd words. 

**_" You must help me_ ** **_cl_ ** **_-… the_ ** **_br_ ** **_-…, Lucifer! "_ **

**_" We_ ** **_ne_ ** **_-...to move. Now. "_ **

" Shut up... ", Lucifer replied weakly, slowly shaking his head to get rid of this odd hearing phenomenon. 

Maybe he was hallucinating... Yeah, maybe. 

He tried to focus on his disordered progression, on the regular shooting pain along his feet scratched by the rough touch of sand and rocks. One step after another. He didn't have to stop. 

'Not stop. 

**_" Hurry up! They're co-…! "_ **

He was thirsty. 

'So thirsty. 

Why did his throat remain dry and achy? He needed water. Alcohol would have been preferable, but water now seemed to him a nectar much more precious and a hundred times more enjoyable than all his priceless bottles kept in his penthouse. 

Water. 

Just one drop. A single drop. 

**_" The main part of the troops has been requisitioned to contain the in-… "_ **

**_" Shut the hell up! "_** , he wanted to scream with all his strength. 

Which wasn't much, actually. An angry murmur was the only thing that hardly came out from his burned mouth. His words, which were intended to be aggressive, disrupted Lucifer's balance who staggered for some distance before collapsing on his knees on the ravaged ground. He stayed like this, breathless with his heart beating fiercely inside his chest. 

It wasn't a good sign. Not at all. 

The voices stopped, at least. 

He pushed on his hands but couldn't stand up. He had to stand up. 

He had to move. 

_" But... where? "_

Lucifer looked in front of him, seeing only the same burned ground, the same rocks and seedlings. 

Always the same landscape. 

Always the same fatality. 

Always the same fear. 

Was he lost? Maybe. Maybe not. 'Hard to say. It was hard for him to think. Breathing, too. When was he getting out of this barren area? An increasingly muggy torpor was teasing his limbs and his will. He'd have liked so much give way to it. Nothing and no one could stop him. 

He was alone in the middle of nowhere. 

Alone and exhausted. 

**_" So... I'm coming over now to tell you the truth about me. "_ **

Lucifer leaned on his hands, straightening up on his shaky legs very slowly. 

No way he stays there. 

Lucifer kept walking straight ahead, unwavering. Disregarding the pain, the fatigue and these odd voices that was whispering in his ears again. Disregarding the heat, the thirst... absolutely everything, except for one single thing. 

One single person. 

One single promise. 

" 'm coming over. ", he mumbled to the arid horizon. 

He wouldn't break his word. He would never break it and even less to the detective. 

The Devil's word was his bond. 

" I'm coming over... "

 

** ***** **

 

Everything was so... _yellow._  

Why? 

He was sure there was a logical explanation to this phenomenon, but he couldn't remember it. All he knew came down to this blinding, unvarying hue in front of him. 

Strange, really. 

The sky shouldn't have been so bright, he thought. The sky should have been blue. 

Not yellow. Not so dazzling. 

Lucifer kept watching, pursuing his quite relevant study about the unusual hue of the skies. He frowned after a time, another question appearing in his mind. 

Wasn't he walking? 

Yes, he had walked. In this desert. 

And then what? 

Just that yellowish bright in front of him. 

He'd never really liked this color. It was rough, difficult to wear, even for him. It was really an awful hue. It even managed to seep beyond his closed eyelids now. 

Really invasive. 

Why did he have to deal with this, already? 

He had no idea. Just a vague sensation of  _urgency._  Something to do. Something essential, wasn't it? 

Maybe. 

This quirky yellow hue went further, tirelessly assaulting his eyes, but also his body. Lucifer felt weak tremors affecting his shoulder and then his arm. 

" 'ack...off... ", he tried to say. 

The color began to make sounds just as strange. A muffled, steady noise that came with each new insistent tremor along his numb limb. A color wasn't supposed to act that way.

Another tremor against his arm came. Just like another indistinct sound. 

" Go...Go away. ", he mumbled, turning his head imperceptibly to the side, annoyed. 

The color forced him to face it by firmly holding his face with its hands, Lucifer grumbling other incomprehensible insults while struggling weakly in its embrace. He froze after a while, confused. 

Hands.

A color couldn't have hands, could it? 

"…-ir? Open your eyes! Come on! "

And a color couldn't definitely speak. 

Open his eyes. 

Open his eyes...

Lucifer began to fight against the numbness of his limbs and mind, he fought against the brightness and opened his eyelids slightly. 

A blurry shadow was before him, shaking him gently and shouting encouragement. He frowned before closing his eyes again, dazzled by the merciless rays of the star in the sky. 

" No, no, no! Come on! Wake up! ", said the shadow. 

It didn't seem like he was sleeping, though. He was tired, but...

Lucifer felt something hard against his crazed lips. Something hard and  _wet_. 

Water. 

He tried to lift his head and grab with his hand the bottle that was moistening his mouth, which was grazed by heat and sand. That hands that held his face moved to his back to straighten him a little and help him drinking more easily. The liquid ran along his palate and inside his throat in an unbroken delightful flow, but it quickly stopped.  Lucifer then opened his eyes again, letting out a groan of protest against the person responsible for this interruption. 

The previous shadow had faded for more precise shapes. A face. A worried look. A man he didn't know. 

" Easy there. If you drink too fast, you're gonna throw up on me and I really don't want to take that chance. Can you tell me your name? "

Throwing up? 

The devil didn't throw up. 

Lucifer blinked several times, puzzled. 

Who was that man? Why did he support him like that in his arms? Why did he want his name? 

He lost interest in that person to turn his head to the side. Beyond the steady light of the sun, he could now see the asphalt road frequently smoothed by the sand of the desert it was crossing. This road where he seemed to have been lying for a while. He could see a car a few feet away, the driver's side door wide open. Probably the man's car, who was trying to catch his attention. 

What now? 

He winced as he felt the tremors through his numb body as this stranger shook him more sharply. 

"  _Your name!_  What's your name? "

His name. 

Well, if he really wanted to know...

" L-Lu...'ifer. "

" Lucifer? The Devil himself, huh? ", he joked, finally allowing him to drink another sip of water. " You're lucky I've driven nearby! I'm Zach. "

Lovely. 

The water ran along his chin, then dripping on his chest burned by sunlight. The devil... _burned._  

Again. 

" No, no! Stay with me, Lucifer, okay? Open your eyes! I'm gonna take you to the hospital. You just have to stay awake... Can you do this for me? "

Had he closed his eyes again? 

He didn't even notice. He felt sorry for this. Apparently, his body refused to obey him. Like his thoughts. And maybe it wasn't that bad. He was tired of that yellow. Tired of struggling against sleep without any acceptable reason. 

No. 

There was a reason. 

Of course, there was one. He remembered it, now. 

Lucifer groaned as he tried to move his arm, cursing his weakness, and gripped Zach's sleeve with shaking fingers. He struggled to keep his eyes open, his eyelids slowly lowering on them with impressive efficiency as he hardly said a few words to this  _do-gooder_ : 

" Decker. C-Ch...'oe Decker. LAPD...'must... "

" Decker? ", Zach repeated. " I must  _what_?  ** _Hey!_** Stay with me, pal! "

He wasn't going anywhere, though. 

He was just closing his eyes, that's all. 

'Better to close his eyes. 

This yellow was terrible. 

 

** ***** **

 

"…-ojave's desert. All he could tell me was that he seemed been there for a while. One day, maybe more than that. " 

" We can check the area, but-… "

" I know, Dan. It would be a miracle if we found anything useful. "

What were that voices? 

He couldn't put a name on it. He knew them, however. There was a creasing sound, followed by a sigh expressing some helplessness. 

" Look, the doctors said he was out of danger. "

" Yeah, I know. But-… ", protested the more feminine voice. 

More pleasant to hear, too. 

" He's fine. It's  _Lucifer_... He'll get over it. "

Another sigh. He would have liked to know who was speaking, who was sighing so much. Know where he was and why. There must have been a reason for his presence here, right? 

There must have been a reason for this. 

Another sharp sound. Footsteps. 

" He'll be fine. ", repeated the familiar male voice. " Trust me, Chloe. "

Chloe. 

_Chloe..._

Right, he remembered now. He had to find the detective. He had to tell her. Tell her that all this was a terrible misunderstanding. She had to know...

Lucifer the rough sheet covering his numb body, this simple gesture quickly awakening a shooting pain inside his limbs. He groaned weakly, caught off guard by all these truly uncomfortable sensations. 

Why did he feel like his skull was split in two parts? 

" Lucifer? ", asked the female voice. 

He tried to answer, but only an incomprehensible grunt came out of his mouth. If he couldn't say two consistent syllables, perhaps could he open his eyes? It was worth the try, anyway. 

At first, he saw nothing more than the same darkness, so much so that he thought he'd felt miserably with this, too. Then, the darkness suddenly vanished from his field of vision, revealing hazy shapes at first. Two people. A rather tough man and a woman with blond hair standing near a window with lowered blinds. 

The woman turned to the man, quickly grabbing his arm as her still hazy face remained turned toward Lucifer. 

" Find a doctor...  _Now!_ ", she told him. 

A doctor? 

For who?  _Him?_

Lucifer heard the man going out of the room like a shot as he blinked several times. He looked around him confusingly. He stared for a long time at the IV hanging over his head and the cardiac monitor next to it. 

Was he in a hospital? 

" Lucifer? You hear me? "

He looked down and realized that the young woman had approached without he'd noticed. He blinked again, her rough and hazy features gradually becoming clearer to his relief. 

It wasn't any young woman. Certainly not. 

It was  _her_. 

It was her gray eyes. Her mouth. Her face. 

" C'loe... ", he managed to say with difficulty. 

Damn it, his throat was so dry. 

Chloe seemed to read his mind and took a glass of water near the bed, helping him to drink a few sips under her worried look. Lucifer swallowed and gave her a faint smile. 

Better. Much better. 

" 'Seems the devil can also drink water from time to time. ", the detective teased him, though he could notice a slight tremor in her voice. 

He wanted to laugh, but his body called him to order. 

Right. 

_Mortality._  Fortunately, the detective wasn't with him in this bloody desert. 

" It's definitely not worth a good Scotch... ", he whispered, looking at her. 

" Scotch is not recommended for severe dehydration, unfortunately. "

" Well, that's unfortunate. "

They both stopped talking. Chloe kept looking at him, a gleam he couldn't quite define crossing her gaze at one point before disappearing. She put the glass on the table and sat on a seat near him, giving him a forced smile. He noticed that red marks were encircling her eyes. 

Had she cried? Why? 

" What happened? ", asked Lucifer, quite disturbed by his partner's sudden silence. 

" A tourist found you lying on the highway in the middle of the desert a few hours ago. ", Chloe explained, looking toward the corridor before focusing her attention on him again. 

" Desert...Yeah, I remember. " 

" What else do you remember? ", she asked him like a good cop and the worried friend she was.

Lucifer tried to focus, but his thoughts ran away from him. He couldn't remember anything useful except his call. 

" I remember calling you last night, that's all. I'm sorry to have let you down, Detective. I can assure you th-… "

She had frowned in perplexity by listening to him, sitting up before placing her hand on his, more worried. 

" Lucifer...", she said, interrupting his clumsy apologies. " Can you tell me what's the today's date? "

He looked at her, puzzled. 

" Well... ", he thought out loud. " Correct me if I'm wrong, but yesterday was the sixth June. Why do you ask, Detective? " 

She stared at him without batting an eye, clasping his hand with hers as her partner stared at her too, confused. 

Why the today's date was so important? 

He heard Daniel's annoying voice outside the room, but ignored it. Chloe's prolonged silence and her look, both expressing an emotion far beyond anxiety, caught his full attention. 

" Detective? "

" Lucifer... We weren't the sixth June yesterday. ", she told him, while carefully watching his reactions. 

He kept staring at her without understanding. Why did yesterday's date upset her that much now? It couldn't be that important, could it? It was just a date. 

A date. That's all. 

" What do you mean? ", he couldn't help asking, fazed. 

" We're...", she stopped, hardly swallowing, looking anywhere else inside the room except him. " We're the twelfth July. "

Twelfth July. 

No. No, that was impossible. Just yesterday, he was coming out of the hospital – to come back a few hours later, it seemed – and... 

No. It couldn't be true. 

Lucifer gently shook his head while frowning, confused. Chloe looked at him again, squeezing his hand almost painfully to tell him the horrible reality he was struggling to deny. 

" You've been missing for a long time, Lucifer. More than a month... "

**TBC**


	2. Retrogade humanity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer was found in the middle of the desert by Zach, a tourist.   
> A whole month had passed since the night of his kidnapping… What happened to him all this time?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s notes :  
> _______________________  
> Finally! I’ve finally finished this damn translation. Sorry, sorry. I’ve been a lot busy. The third chapter is already written in French and read by one of my beta’s, so… You should have its translation rather quickly. I’ve also already begun to write the next part of “ What the Devil needs “ in French.   
> Good news, huh?   
> Thanks for the comments and kudos.   
> Happy reading !

**RETROGRADE HUMANITY**

It seemed so ludicrous.

Almost overrated.

As overrated and unsurprising as a soap could be.

“ Can you tell me your whole name? “

“ Lucifer Morningstar. “

Of course, the audience always had the feeling of seeing, of being a witness to a unique event on this insignificant screen. The depicted situation was nonetheless ludicrous and so easily predictable for any reasonable person.

It was _ludicrous_ to him.

“ Where have you been living until recently? “

“ Los Angeles. “

Nothing made sense. And thinking this about his situation wasn’t that surprising too, was it? Anyone else in his position would react like him and would find all this senseless.

But he was certainly not _anyone else_.

He was the Devil.

“ Since how long have you been living there? “

“ Almost six years. “

What was happening to him was never trivial or similar to any other human experience. Then how something such ridiculously _human_ could happen to him?

“ And where did you spend your childhood? “

“ First, at the Silver City before being sent straight to Hell for asking far less stupid questions than yours… “

Lucifer, who had been looking at the yellowed wall in front of his bed until then, turned his head and glared annoyingly at the doctor who had been disturbing his thoughts for a few minutes now. The practitioner blinked several times in a rather funny way, probably analyzing the last sharp sentence of his patient and find thus a sensical meaning to it.

Did talking about a mysterious Silver City and Hell in one sentence mean that he was suffering of a much more serious amnesia? Or was it showing another neurological disorder?

Maybe. Who cared?

Here were the facts, with or without his diabolical delusions, which seemed to think this doctor and the detective sitting on a chair far from his bed and the two men, staying in the background.

Lucifer, the devil himself, had lost his memory.

And asking him a lot of absurd questions didn’t put things right or appease his bad mood at all.

The doctor in charge of his examination - and whose name didn’t matter to him – slightly stepped back and cleared his throat to express his embarrassment. Lucifer said nothing more, keeping watching silently the wall in front of him as Chloe stood up and talked with this supposedly experienced neurologist. He listened to them distractedly, bringing back his aching legs against his chest, annoyed by the shooting pain between his shoulder blades that never left him, not even with all the legal drugs they gave him since his arrival here.

His occasional mortality near the detective could sometimes have some benefits.

The wall painting, yellowed by years, reminded him vaguely and to a lesser extent the vivid hue of the desert where he had walked after his abrupt awakening. It seemed normal to find that sandy arid tint in a town so far away from any other civilized people.

Yuccah Valley.

A lovely small town of twenty thousand inhabitants in California’s San Bernardino County. Lovely and suffocating, both for the sand that seemed being able to pervade every tiny millimeter of the town and for the material and mental simplicity of the people who willingly lived there.

That was where he had ended up after a long chaotic wander in the desert. Nevertheless, Lucifer remained convinced that he had done better than Jesus a few thousand years ago. It could hardly be worse than this asshole, that said. Lucifer once again heard a whisper that didn’t come from the other people in the room, not from the shabby corridor of the hospital either. He closed his eyes and sighed, waiting – as he had done since waking up here – that it stopped.

He couldn’t do anything else.

Wait until they shut the hell up. Until it starts again.

The whispers were weaker than those he had heard during his long walk towards civilization, at least a _semblance_ of it. Syllables barely more audible than a light breeze in his ear. Words that vanished into silence as soon as he deigned to listen to them, as much out of boredom as out of curiosity.

Chloe, still politely conversing with the doctor in the center of the small bedroom given to him, gave him a worried look.

Of course, she had noticed.

He didn’t know better detective than she. She who was used to study people’s body language for a case. She had obviously noticed this slight movement he was doing as soon as this fleeting sound was brushing his ears, this discreet start and this slight tension in his limbs. He did his best to hide it, but Chloe wasn’t fooled by him. Lucifer stooped looking at the wall as the detective stopped looking at him out of the corner of her eye, both focusing on the practitioner’s predictable diagnosis.

“… Mr. Morningstar’s retrograde amnesia can be explained. A severe dehydration and physical exertion over such a long period may, to a lesser extent, have impaired his cognitive abilities for a short period of time. It’s our first theory. “

“ What about the other? “, the detective immediately asked, crossing her arms on her chest.

“ The other possibility – the most likely – is this serious head trauma to the back of his skull that we actually can’t define the origin. I’d never seen anything like these marks in my whole career… Anyway, it’s normal then to lose a significant part of your memories after that. “

“ Will he quickly get his memory back or-…? “, she insisted.

The doctor sighed softly, expressing his utter helplessness to solve this problem by some medical way. It was unlikely, however, that this kind of solution has a real chance to work on the devil.

“ I can’t answer you right now. “, he told her, putting his pen in his white jacket. “ Some patients get their memories back after a while, but unfortunately… Most lose them forever after this kind of trauma. I’m sorry. “

Lucifer let out a disdainful exclamation when he heard these pathetic sheepish apologies. A heavy silence ensued to such an extent that he could have heard a bloody bug fly and suffocate in the sand on the floor. Why did they call this town “ Yucca Valley”? _Sand_ Valley seemed much more appropriate, from what he said.

“ Okay. When will he be able to leave this room? “, the detective asked, Lucifer feeling her disapproving look on him.

The doctor cleared his throat to hide his embarrassment and hurried to answer her:

“ Well, we should first do some extra exams before even thin-… “

“ No. “

They both turned to Lucifer who, despite the heavy numbness of his limbs, pretended to remove the rough cover covering his body to finally leave this horrible bed.

“ I beg your pardon? Bu-…! Mr. Morningstar, you ca-…! “, exclaimed the practitioner, seeing his patient _physically_ ignoring his medical opinion.

He never thought that standing up could be so difficult and exhausting. He managed to do so anyway, holding on to his bed with one hand so as not to fall to the ground or show any sign of weakness. Lucifer glared at the neurologist, making him understand that he didn’t need or care about his help and advice.

“ I’m leaving. “, he said. “ Not tomorrow or in a few days, but _right now_ , Doctor! “

The doctor, scared with his stubborn patient’s threatening tone, stammered some unintelligible words before Chloe took part in the discussion for him and Lucifer.

“ His health isn’t in real danger if he leaves the hospital today, right? “

“ I’m afraid it’s quite the reverse, Detective! “

“ _Lucifer…_ “

He rolled his eyes and sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling on annoyingly on the stiff collar of his nightshirt. Why put on such irritating thing while your health was at its lowest? A curious way to end his life, really…

The neurologist pinched his lips, torn between his purely professional qualms and his personal desire not to see Lucifer again and thus no longer suffer his bad mood. A few seconds passed before he agreed to this reasonable request.

“ I can’t deny that your state of health has changed for the better since your admission. “, he granted. “ This said, you must promise me to strictly rest for the next days. You don’t just have a cold or something! It would be wise not to overestimate your strength. “

“ I don’t bloody ne-… “

“ He’ll do it. “, then promised the detective for him. “ I’ll make sure he’ll rest, Doctor. “

_“ Ow!_ Can’t wait to see you try, Detective! “, he teased her by way of reprisal and from habit, too.

She didn’t reply, though.

The anonymous doctor – in Lucifer’s mind, at least – gave them a curious look before leaving the room, telling them he would take care of the hospital forms. A silence as heavy as the previous one filled the space between the two partners. Lucifer paid no real attention to it, irritated by this stupid human’s requests about his health. He was immortal! Staying still for several days wouldn’t help him find the person responsible for his kidnapping.

He risked a look towards the young woman who kept looking at him insistently.

“ So… What is your devilish plan to make me do your _deepest darkest desire_ , Detective? “, he asked her with a slight smile. “ Handcuffs are quite useless to me, as you know, but I wouldn’t mind if you’re planning to use them for anot-… “

“ You’re gonna stay to my place tonight and start happily bouncing at Lux again while I’ll be hundred percent sure that you’re fine. “, she interrupted him authoritatively.

“ I am _fine_! “, he shouted, annoyed.

His tone was sharper than he would have liked, but he didn’t apologize for it. He put his feet on the old floor and stand up. The movement seemed much more difficult than before. Or maybe was it the drugs finally acting on his body? Still, he staggered while darkness suddenly impeded his sight. Lucifer clenched the metal fence around the bed and shut his eyes, his breathing becoming jerky. When he opened them again, he saw Chloe’s worried face who was supporting him to prevent him from falling at her feet.

“ You’re anything but fine, Lucifer! “, she replied, just as annoyed by his stubbornness. “ Here’s the deal; either you do what I say for once and you’ll leave this hospital in the hour or I’m gonna talk again with the doctor who’ll keep you tied up to this bed for the next two weeks… Deal? “

They looked each other, each one defying the other with the same intensity. Finally, Lucifer abdicated with another exasperated sigh and abruptly stepped away from the young woman’s embrace.

“ Well, you’re a tough negotiator, Detective! Fine, then… ‘Seems we have a deal. But I flat-out refused to leave this room like that! “, he said, showing the questionable nightshirt.

Chloe looked at it and sighed before nodding.

“ I’m gonna get you some clean clothes. Don’t move, I’ll be right back. “

She then left the room, Lucifer fulminating against her stubbornness to slow his investigation. The situation, _his_ current situation didn’t allow him any respite. His kidnapping was already rather questionable, but the fact that he had disappeared for so long and left in the desert without remembering anything about it…

How could he have even been so easily neutralized?

The detective wasn’t around at that time, was she? Truth be told, he didn’t know this for sure. Not yet. Even if she actually was near the hospital that night, that didn’t explain that gaping hole in his memory. She made him vulnerable and mortal, but a physical aggression of that kind couldn’t be due to her strange power on him.

It couldn’t explain the return of his wings either.

**H** is Father was inevitably involved in all this.

Why? Why giving him back his wings? Why take his memories away for such a short period of time?

Wh-…?

Lucifer lifted his head as he heard the handle grate under the slight pressure made by someone outside the room. Chloe came in and closed the door behind her, giving him some folded clothes with worn black sneakers. He looked at this with a horrified expression.

“ Is this your own way of tormenting me for not having been nice with the dear Dr. _Moron_ ? “, he asked, unfolding the red black checkered shirt with his fingertips.

“ Is it working? “, asked Chloe, amused by his disgust.

“ Maze would look like a puppy next to you! “, Lucifer said, sniffing a piece of fabric, suspicious. “ Where did you find that? I’m not a bloody woodcutter! “

“ That’s all I could find to the lost property. No Armani in there, I’m afraid. “

“ I will _never_ wear these things, Detective! “

Chloe shrugged, feigning a sincere disinterest about his clothing distress and crossed her arms.

“ As you wish. Stay here, then. Or you can leave this place bare-naked, I don’t care. “

“ Weren’t you claiming your concern about my well-being earlier? If it’s the price to pay to leave this bloody town… “, he mumbled before moving away from the bed.

“ Where are you going? “, asked the detective, placing her hand on his chest to stop him.

Lucifer stared at her with some confusion and then showed with his head the half-opened door leading to the bathroom.

“ To some _privacy_. “, he told her.

“ Since when you need some? “

“ Since when does it bother you? “, he replied without answering her first question, intrigued by her behavior.

The detective had a really odd behave with him. She didn’t seem… comfortable with him. Of course, she was feigning to perfection – almost as well as he, he had to admit – this disinterest and sarcasm she had always had since the beginning of their wonderful partnership.

But, as time passed, something didn’t sound right.

He couldn’t say what exactly. Something was different; she was acting differently even if she was trying to hide it under her usual comeback.

What was happening to her?

After looking him strangely, the young woman removed her hand from his chest and moved away, embarrassed.

“ Okay…Uhmm… “

He stared at her again, more puzzled and slowly moved – slow down by this heavy tension inside his legs with each of his steps – to the bathroom without a word, Chloe nevertheless saying another strange speech behind him.

“ I-…I’ll stay here. Just-… Just in case. “

Lucifer didn’t answer her, closing the door with flaking paint behind him. Did the low intellect of this town have already affect the detective’s mental abilities? It was therefore all the more urgent to leave this place and quickly go back to real civilization. At least, he hadn’t had to endure the same strangeness with Daniel, who was already gone back to LA a few hours ago.

He put the clothes on the edge of the sink with a cracked basin. He leaned over the mirror and stared long at his drawn features and the many grazes and burn marks on his face and neck. Lucifer loosened the lace holding his nightshirt – cursing again this shooting pain that sprang up between his shoulder blades – and let it fall at his feet. The mirror barely giving a reflection of his body until his shoulder, he couldn’t easily examine the rest of his body harassed by the desert so long.

By the desert and something else.

Something or _someone_ else.

Lucifer sighed softly, turning slightly to touch a bruise as big as his head along his left side. He could at least be sure for having fiercely fight back against his attackers. The bruise began to turn into a quite awful blue circle, remaining purplish-blue in its center. What did the medical team say about this? That these bruises were recent, barely a day or two old? Corporal marks in lieu of his wavering memory, reminding him this fight that had surely happened right before he’d been left alone in the middle of nowhere.

Why leaving him there after a whole month of… absence? Had he been hold captive somewhere for all this time and then suddenly release?

None of this made sense, even with his **F** ather as the mean suspect.

After putting the jeans on him reluctantly, he ran his hand absent-mindedly over the sensitive middle of the bruise where he had been hit; feeling suddenly dizzy.

_Pain._

**_“ Go ! “_ **

_‘A quick gateway._

_Now._

**_“ Lucifer, go ! “_ **

“ Lucifer?! “

First, Lucifer felt something cold and rough running along his neck.

Why was he seeing little black spots before his eyes?

That was strange…

He blinked several times, hoping to make disappear this phenomenon, and shook his head for putting him straight.

This horrible dizzy feeling disappeared as quickly as it came, leaving him panting and half slumped on the sink. He heard a familiar rustle while Chloe was calling him from the bedroom, concern changing her voice just like his previous dizziness did. He lifted his head and looked in the broken mirror his white wings that had instinctively appeared in his back and had violently hit the mirror in front of him, a few pieces of broken glass running along his black hair. He heard the door handle turn as the detective called him again.

“ Lucifer? What’s go-…? “

He quickly made disappear his feathery appendages – glad that he still could count on his instincts unaffected by his actual condition – the young woman’s face appearing a moment later through the half-opened door. She opened it totally when she saw him and rushed to him.

“ _Lucifer !_ “

He vaguely waved his hand to tell her he was fine, unable to say a coherent sentence right now. He was still struggling to catch his breath and a shooting pain – increased by his partner’s voice - was rising along his sweaty temples.

What the hell happened?

“ ‘m fine… Everything’s fine, Detective. Just…’eel a bit dizzy. “

“ I call the doc! “

“ No! “, he gasped. “ That won’t be necessary. “

Lucifer expected some exclamations totally opposed to leaving him like that without further deep auscultation, but nothing came. Not a word or a threatening order… Nothing. Just another odd silence. He straightened up a little - more alert than before - and looked the detective, surprised by her lack of reaction. She seemed frozen, stupefaction petrifying her lovely face, scrutinizing without blinking once his bare back.

“ Something wrong, Detective? “, he asked politely.

She opened her mouth without being able to answer him or say one single syllable, keeping looking his back. She approached her hand and made a slight pressure on it, asking him thus to turn.

“ I-… Lucifer, your back… “, she whispered at last to his great relief.

“ My back? “

She touched the perfect skin – except the few burns all over his body -  of his shoulder blades with her fingertips.

“ Your scars… They’re _gone_ ! Wh-…What happened? “, she exclaimed, stunned.

Lucifer flinched slightly with her hands along his skin, the muscles of his wings still too much sensitive to really appreciate this touch, even if he didn’t really use them since their required return in his life.

Grim-faced, Lucifer met Chloe’s gaze, unable to hide any longer his distress and helplessness about what had happened to him, what was happening to him…

“ I can’t remember… “

**-xXx-**

Lucifer sighed again, craning his neck to take another look – probably the thousandth in half an hour – towards Chloe. Filling some papers in to release the devil from such a dusty town seemed last for an eternity. He stood less and less for the stifling air inside the corridor which separated him from freedom from only a few meters.

A half-freedom.

Total freedom would have included alcoholic drinks and his penthouse. At the very least. It was an excellent starting point, according to him.

He watched the detective’s face being swallowed through the regular noisy, sweaty passing of people in this corridor. How could there be so many people gathered in one place in such a small town? He was so eager to breathe the fresh air from the outside, from LA. He leaned against the wall and resigned himself to wait a bit longer for his partner, however more and more tempted to steal her car keys and thus go away faster. Another minute lost here to sign another bloody paper was another minute lost to find out what happened to him the last month.

He absent-mindedly dusted one of his sleeves rolled up at the elbows, cursing again that he had to wear these horrible things longer than he wanted. He surely looked ridiculous with this outfit. And the devil couldn’t afford to be ridiculous.

“ Lucifer? “

He lifted his head and stared at the man standing now in front of him. He frowned, certain to have already met him before, but he wasn’t able to put a name on this juvenile face. The man was tall, almost as tall as he was, and had bright blond hair. A blond hue quite rare in America. A European, maybe?

“ Do you recognize me? “, he asked him, smiling kindly and offering him his hand. “ _Zach !_ “

Lucifer finally made the connection between this name and the man’s face in his mind after a few seconds, letting out a slight exclamation as soon as he remembered, shaking his hand.

“ The Good Samaritan mad enough to help the Devil, right? Of course, how could I forget that? “

_How could he forget…_

It was, indeed, an excellent question. And an unpleasant quirk of fate.

“ You’re probably the craziest of the two of us for having walked in the desert without water or food! “, he teased him, wrinkles surrounding his gray eyes.

“ Well, can’t say it was a personal choice… “

“ Yeah, I heard that. Sorry, pal. “

“ It could have been worse if I didn’t meet you, Zach. “, Lucifer said, shrugging. “ You helped me and I’d like to return the favor. “

Zach squinted, intrigued.

“ Return the favor, you say? “

“ Yes and you should make the most of it. The Devil doesn’t often owe a favor to someone. It’s quite the reverse, actually. “

“ _Make a deal with the Devil_ ? ‘Sounds pretty dicey to me, uhm? “, replied Zach.

He really liked this tourist and his way of thinking.

Lucifer smirked and said:

“ My hellish abilities don’t imply risks; I’m just looking for pleasure. For me and my guests. If you ever go to LA any day, these pleasures will wait for you at Lux! You won’t regret this! “

He heard Chloe call him across the hall; she finished to write boring paperwork and was walking away from the mean counter.

Finally.

Lucifer turned to Zach and caught his gaze towards the detective, a strange smile on his lips. He shook the devil’s hand again to say goodbye, giving him however a knowing look.

“ Chloe Decker from LAPD, I guess? I understand now your reaction when I’ve found you! “

He then walked away, quickly disappearing among the many sick people around them, leaving behind him a puzzled Lucifer.

“ What did he mean by that? “, asked Chloe who had managed to join him and thus heard the last odd words of his savior.

“ I have no idea, Detective. “, said her partner as he was still looking where Zach had disappeared. “ The Europeans have always been really strange people and it didn’t go better over the centuries, you know. One day, I wa-… “

“ Great. “, she interrupted him quickly, shaking her keys under his nose. “ So? Ready to go back to civilization? “

Moving away from the wall where he was leaning so far, Lucifer nodded and gave a bright smile to the young woman holding the keys of his freedom.

“ I’ve been ready _for ages_ , Detective! “

 

 

**_TBC… “ Aurora Insomnia “_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s notes :   
> ____________________  
> What do you think about this story ? Let a comment to tell me ^^  
> I’ll publish in two weeks; maybe the first chapter of “ In a new Light “ (part 2 of “What the Devil needs”) or the next chapter of “ From Darkness arose the Light”, I don’t know yet. We’ll see!   
> Thanks for reading me and until next time !

**Author's Note:**

> So? XD 
> 
> What do you think about this first chapter?   
> Let me a little comment as always. I'll answer to each one of them as always ^^   
> Thank you for reading this first chapter. I won't write the next chapter right now. I have to finish other stories in the meantime (GOT, what the devil needs,...)
> 
> Bye !


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